Throughout all of this I have been fairly silent about my husband. For one very important reason. Words simply cannot describe the respect, admiration and love that I have for him. The strength and support which he has given me cannot be summed up in letters, sentences, paragraphs or novels. He has silently absorbed so much of my pain and channeled it into productivity within our house. He's bathed and showered our girls for much of my pregnancy and towards the end he took on dishwashing, cooking and cleaning duties as well. Since my surgery he has continued, allowing me to just sit and be whatever I need to be in the moment. He has done whatever I need, whatever I want, with no questions, no complaints, no hesitation. He has hugged me, wiped my tears and almost literally carried me through the long days and nights since letting go of my youngest son. When both of our sons were born, he gently handed me each precious baby and allowed me not to let go. Most of the pictures we have are of me snuggling our sons, kissing them, whispering to them words of love.
A particularly precious gift my husband gave me after Eli's birth, I received after returning home from the hospital. I believe what my husband witnessed is a small miracle sent from heaven. We have solar lights in a ring around the willow tree garden at the top of my blog. Snow has covered the garden and lights for most of the winter. My husband says he has taken to glancing out the window at Wyatt's garden each night before bed. Before we went to the hospital for Eli's birth he had been seeing one light each night. The night we came home from the hospital after Eli's birth when he looked out the window there were two lights lit in the garden. One for each of our precious sons, now together.