We said our final goodbyes to sweet Eli yesterday. It was the same funeral home but so different. A different year, different month, different season and different child. Same family. Everyone was wonderful. There were so many "I'm sorries" left hanging so perfectly. Just when one thinks that her heart cannot break any further, it does. Our middle daughter wanted to hold her baby brother again and again. It was as if she could not bear to let him go. Watching her sob so hard in her beautiful pink princess dress was very difficult. Holding her little body and drying her tears was gave me more comfort than I understand. It was a very special time. Wyatt is buried between the future graves of my husband and myself. Eli is buried at his feet.
I have these song lyrics by O.A.R. running through my head, "How many times can I break 'til I shatter?"
Today our oldest returned to school. She was so excited to share Eli and his pictures with her classmates. It gave me so much joy to help her select pictures to share and see the excitement and pride she takes in her little brother. She said it went very well and her teacher even emailed me to tell me how wonderfully she did sharing Eli and his pictures and answering her classmates' questions. She told me she even shared Wyatt today. What a brave little girl. Today my heart swells with pride for all of our children.