Monday, June 27, 2011
The Things We Haven't Done
In the last almost four months there are some things yet that we haven't done and, to be honest, things I am not yet ready to do. The mylar balloons which we had brought to the hospital for Eli's birthday still float lazily in our living room. Actually, one out of three is floating above the carpet while the other two lounge beneath it. Since that day we have celebrated three other birthdays in our small family, one at the cemetery and two at home. Still, those balloons remain a daily decoration. I suppose someday soon I will have to find them a different home, one where the vacuum cleaner doesn't prey upon their existence, but not today. The other thing is actually a whole pile of things in our bedroom. The pile consists of everything Eli, things from the hospital, the clothes he wore, blankets, etc. all carefully protected in sealed bags alongside pictures, newspapers from the day he was born, cards we received, things from the funeral. It just sits there. I only look enough to know its there and just like most things these too have faded into the background and are hardly noticed. But I do know they're there and that they won't always be there. Just not today.