May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face, and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
-Irish Blessing

Friday, April 13, 2012

Down to the Wire

I now have less than a week until my c-section date.  So far so good.  The heavy umbrella of last spring's delivery memories has lifted slightly and allowed excitement to creep in.  Like any good athlete, I find myself visualizing the best outcome, a healthy baby girl in my arms at the end of the day.  My youngest daughter accompanied me to my last OB appointment this week and while we were listening to the heartbeat I was talking to her about it and she asked if that meant that this girl would not die.  What an awful thing for a 3 1/2 year old to think about.  But for us it's real.  That's really the one thing our girls are worried about, that this baby will really get to come home with us - that she won't die.  The more awful thing is that it doesn't feel right to give them a 100% guarantee that she won't die.  Instead I find myself telling them that she appears perfectly healthy and everything should be okay.  It's the same thing that I tell myself all the time.  It is what I have to believe to get through the upcoming days and in my heart of hearts it is really what I believe.


  1. What a thing to have weigh not on just your mind as an adult but your children. This sounds tough but I believe you will see this time through. hugs and well wishes to you-

  2. I hope everything goes well. Sending you lots of hugs and prayers.

  3. (Read this part as if it was written the day you posted.) And I believe that you are doing the best thing for them by not making promises you can't keep. How disappointing to not only have another baby sibling die, but feel like your parent lied to you, also. I truly believe this little girl will come home with you, but like you're describing...the reality is that it isn't a sure thing. It's a hard truth that your girls will grow up knowing instead of being slapped in the face with it as adults (like us). You're a good momma to all of your children and I hope that I can be as honest, sincere and loving to mine.

    And congrats! I'm not sure what your c-section date was but it is 7 days past when you posted this so I assume your sweet baby girl has arrived!



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